As we count down the final hours of 2011, many of us are scrambling to make last minute New Years Eve plans while others have been waiting for this day since January 1st of 2011. While NYE may be a big deal to some, there are actually quite a few people out there who couldn’t care less. Another day, another dawn. Many have made New Year’s Resolutions for 2012 while most of us are still working on some from years back.
Earlier this week, I launched a new thing called #amieasks where I ask the Twitter world a question and with the responses, I put it all together into a blog post and combine it with my thoughts and my experiences. I’m not saying that what I come up with is the right answer, it’s merely a collection of different minds and experiences which I think is kind of neat. Instead of hearing a one-sided story, you get all walks of life voluntarily throwing in their two cents. Keep in mind, I am not disregarding anyone’s opinions or taking sides, it’s just a collage of thoughts. Anyways, I’m sure you get the idea.
All that aside, there’s a superstition that seems to be on the forefront of many people’s minds when this day rolls around. You all know what I’m talking about and we’ve all come across this at some point in our lives. My first #amieasks question was this: “Should it be mandatory for couples to spend NYE together?” What I got was somewhat mind-opening and interesting. First off, before I get into it, try not to dwell upon the word “mandatory”, it was more of an expression that a literal term. Alright, here we go. My first response came from @SeanLind:
“Mandatory, no. But A) Why would you want to spend it with anyone else and B) who would you kiss at the witching hour?”
This seemed to be the most popular answer, that it’s not “mandatory” but that you should want to spend it with your significant other and that if you didn’t want to, then there is be bigger problem. For the most part, I agree with this. Most of us, whether we admit it to ourselves or not, are hopeless romantics. I definitely am, despite my dismissive or tough-act ways, of course I’m thinking about who I’m going to kiss once the clock strikes twelve! It’s romantic and it’s exciting! It’s the same feeling you get when a slow song comes on at a high school dance and you hold your breath hoping that the boy you like is going to ask you to dance. Many people replied with the midnight kiss superstition while others brought up how you should be together to ring in the New Year with your special someone. Some even said that as long as you are together for the countdown, whatever plans you may have after shouldn’t be a big deal. For those of you who don’t know what the superstition is, @soulilala says, “Whoever you kiss at midnight is who you’ll share the year with.”
So. Let’s recap on the general consensus: Together, yes. Midnight kiss superstition, present. Mandatory, no. But on the other hand …
There are other variables that could come into play if you let your mind be open to it. Is it open? Okay, let us proceed. What if NYE wasn’t a big deal to both of you?
“If there is a mutual understand and both are okay then why not? But who wouldn’t want to spend it with their babe.” - @stephaniegee:
Now what if NYE was never a big deal to one person yet a big deal to the other? In this case, I think that the best thing to do if you really love the other person is to do what they want, especially when it doesn’t matter either way to you. Now what about this: What if one person has always had a bad experience with NYE and feels that it’s cursed? Maybe they have always done the midnight kiss thing and it’s always turned out for the worst? You can’t blame them for not wanting to do the midnight kiss if it’s never worked for them in the past. If anything, they’re trying to protect the relationship.
Now, let’s get into types of ways of spending NYE together that might play a part in being together or not. Maybe one person in the relationship hates the club or big events or large venues with massive crowds and the other loves it. No one is to blame here. It’s just a preference in style. I’m sure many couples come across this issue and to be honest, I don’t know what I would do. Sometimes it’s a bitch to get into a venue after a certain time so how do you meet half way and include the countdown? Nevermind the outrageous prices of tickets to NYE events …
“It’d be nice to. If it’s agreed upon to go separate parties, there better not be any resentment. Aren’t we all adults?” - @OmgJonWu
Another big factor is friends. Some couples don’t share the same friends; some don’t even like their significant other’s friends at all. So what do you do? Hypothetically speaking, if my friends didn’t get along with my boyfriend or even his friends, they wouldn’t want each other around for countdown. How do you meet half way for this? Kiss your boyfriend while your friends hug your legs? (Okay that vision made me laugh)
There is so much to think about but when you dilute it all, it usually doesn’t come down to it being personal. Venue, friends, family, past experiences – does it really have to do with you? Really take the time to think about this before breaking up or getting upset about NYE. Take the time to sit down and actually talk about it, get to the bottom of it and figure out a way to meet half way. You might have to make a sacrifice but isn’t that what being in a relationship entails? If your friends know you, they can’t be mad. If your boyfriend or girlfriend loves you, they should understand. The bottom line is to be open and honest and as long as that is alive, you can figure out what to do next. If it is personal, than yes, by the words of @_jmarts, “Houston, we’ve got a problem.”
By the sounds of it, most of the people I know have never had a good NYE experience. What you’re reading might help shed some light on why. High hopes, big expectations, huge disappointment, great despair. Mind you, all of these people were in relationships at the time.
There’s a reason I always try to skip town when it comes to this time of year. I’m not running away, moreso I’m just putting myself in an environment I know won’t let me down because I won’t have any expectations from it. Last year for Christmas to New Years Day, I was in Mexico. I had the time of my life and met some of the most amazing people I still call my friends to this day. Closing my eyes, I can feel the same feelings I had when I was there. No phone, no internet, no technology, no expectations, no judgement, nothing. I walked around with a smile on my face, so happy to be in the moment yet excited to see what would happen next. Anyways, I’m here in Vancouver this year and mind you, I’m not upset that I’m here. It’s not where you are, it’s the mindset you have. Don’t set yourself up for disappointment yet when it turns out well, be happy and grateful. Anyways, I just made up my mind that I don’t want to get into the story of why I’m not huge on NYE. Let’s just say that it was a learning experience of a lifetime and that everything happens for a reason. I am here today because of what was yesterday.
With all of this being said, I just want to leave you with this. New Years Eve is significant if you make it significant. It may mean one thing to someone while a completely different thing to another. Cater to your purpose. If NYE means going out and getting drunk with your friends, by all means go for it! If it means being with your significant other and kissing at midnight, make it passionate. If it means peaceful sleep while the rest of town is downtown, I hope sweet dreams carry you into the New Year. Whatever it is, just keep your heart in the right place and you can’t go wrong. Be safe, don’t drink and drive or I will find you in your drunken sleep and drop you. Be respectful to people and things. I am so excited for each and every one of you to start afresh and may 2012 be the best year of your life. Make it happen ‘cause nobody else will. Cheers